Cut me: I’m Sick II: The Reckoning

Obviously I survived my rather conventional surgery, as an outpatient no less. I sit on my couch, sore as hell, trying to snatch some neighbor’s wifi connection (mine won’t be in till thursday). My state is as follows:

1. My belly has been painted blue with some sort of medical skin wash. Worse, they shaved my hairy Italian belly and the charming “happy trail” of fur that descends from my navel to the top of my pubic hair. I look like 20% of a Pict. If my camera wasn’t still packed away I’d treat you all to a picture.
2. I have three small incisions in my belly, and they hurt like hell.
3. The surgeon pumped air into my stomach to separate my organs for easy removal. Thus I am distended to a painful degree.
4. My mouth has been dry ever since the surgery because of the breathing tube they had inserted.
5. They also inserted a catheter during the operation. You can guess where and what affect it had on me. Ouch, Mr. Zappa!
6. The Oxycodone has reduced the pain to a bearable degree, in a hunched-over sort of way, but I am a bit disoriented and muddy in my thinking. It also makes me alternately hyper and sleepy… like now…

But I am on the mend. And, even better, my mother is coming to town to look after me. She’ll come and finish our moving tasks for us, then cook us dinner and worry over me. Bliss.

I also must admit that I am quite happy and content because this convalescence has been in the company of my wonderful new girlfriend. Life, as painful as it feels, is quite good, and I’m grateful for what I have. I just prefer not to get out of bed to look at it right now.